The Heart of Saturday Night

4th of July

2011-02-21T02:15:00.000-08:00

I remember holding hands with the night
the sound of our little feet and the smell of the pines

And that night when we caught lightning in a jar
and we wouldn't let it out til all of our games were done

And the girl whose bones were shrinking
passed away on the fourth of July
and you always tried to help me think up believable lies

And even though I couldn't see
you described it to me
you made it seem so real
as real as it could be

Our teachers told us not to wait for a cure
That the gifts we were given were noble and pure

And we cried into the spaces between each others arms
And hid ourselves someplace where it was always safe and warm

Although you learned to accept it
I kept fighting with all of my might
You learned to live in the daytime I was still trapped in the night

And even though I couldn't see
you described it to me
you made it seem so real
as real as it could be

Where Is My Mind?

2011-01-22T22:58:00.000-08:00

I was finally able to make a digital copy of a VHS cassette that I've had floating around for the past 10 years of a show my first band played at our house my Senior year of college (2001, I think). I guess the band was called High Ball at the time (I think we changed names every show we played) and it consisted of Me, Tony Terrafranca (drums) and Brian Elyo (Bass) - with special guest appearances by Adam Martin and John Rudolf on vocals. After a little research I figured out how to edit them into shorter song-sized clips, and this is the first one - a cover of The Pixies' song "Where is My Mind." Adam does a great job singing and freaking out. More to come...

In My Head

2011-01-15T21:10:00.000-08:00

We both knew it wasn't meant to be
but it was so hard to make ourselves believe
I never wanted you to go
but after you decided It was like I'd already known

I wake up every morning and look at where you used to be
silent and haunting only dust and shadows to see

And I don't let myself imagine how it could have been
I just wrap my arms around the picture in my head

I know that I'll move on and find someone new
but every time I get close I can't help comparing them to you

And I don't let myself imagine how it could have been
I just wrap my arms around the picture in my head

And when you showed up on my front door
you told me that you wanted to give it another go

Grandfather's Clock

2010-11-25T13:20:00.000-08:00

This is an instrumental cover of a song called "Grandfather's Clock." Originally written around the turn of the century, the song has since become a bluegrass standard. I first came across this song on the album Tone Poems by Tony Rice and David Grisman. It has a really warm, soothing and evocative feel to it and reminds me of crisp winter days in Colorado, relaxing next to a fire. It also sort of reminds me of music that I'd hear around the holidays (both Thanksgiving and Christmas).

I chose this song because it gave me a chance to practice the Mandolin against a simple plucked guitar backdrop. I particularly like the tremolo effect on the Mandolin, and this song uses it throughout.

Hope you enjoy - and have a great Thanksgiving!

The Flame

2010-11-05T22:48:00.000-07:00

Lyrics:

Every day follows the next
in a line of moments that I can't get back
but you came up and showed me the way
to get back the good times and store them away

It's easy to get lost in the dark of the night
when you don't have a candle to hold to the light
but if you hold on, til the sunrise
you'll start to see through her beautiful eyes

and the book that I'm writing is bound
by the sights and the smells and the sounds
and the words that are written in stone
still have the power to cut to the bone

and when I'm old and grey
i hope you'll sit with me and look at me that way
and if the stars should change
ill always think of how you saved me from the flame

Days into weeks and weeks into years
sweat into blood and blood into tears
hate into healing and heart into hope
all of the feelings that make up your home

and the book that I'm writing is bound
by the sights and the smells and the sounds
and the words that are written in stone
still have the power to cut to the bone

This Again

2010-10-23T01:24:00.000-07:00

The light it seems
flows slowly from my dreams
and I wake to the sound
of you snoring
and I try to remember
but my past is far behind
and I'm too busy living in my own mind

And I don't know what you came for
and I don't know why i let you back in
but you are more than i can handle
and I can't handle this again

You came in last night
as I turned out the light
and you ask me if you
could stay the night
I remember saying no
before I said alright
I was too tired to get into a fight

You said that you were just passing through
and you just wanted to see an old friend
you saw that I had my light on
and you had to see me again

And I don't know what you came for
and I don't know why i let you back in
but you are more than i can handle
and I can't handle this again...this again

Sink

2010-10-23T01:18:00.000-07:00

I met you in a cold dark place
out of the light of the sun
all i could see was the shadow of your face
long may you run

And I'll fight for you

I want you to see me
like I never was
like we used to sit and talk
for hours in the dark

And I'll sing for you

And I will look for you
even if I never find the truth
i've told so many lies myself
abandoned them in sickness and in health

The places that you took me
were all deep under ground
you didn't like to see the light
or go out on the town

And i'll sink with you

Invisible Heart

2010-10-10T15:38:00.000-07:00

I got up and wiped the sleep out of my eyes
Looked in the mirror and recognized my disguise
I went out, to find the one I'll never forget
all these years and i haven't found her yet

i listen to the breeze to see what it has to say
the leaves on the trees seem to lead the way

I want you to see my like I never was
back when the future was my favorite drug
I look back to see where I have been
the present is always where the past begins

I wait for the sound of things falling into place
the puzzle unwound and the light when it touches her face

I never thought that it would be easy
but I never thought it would be this hard
I was obsessed with a memory
I fell in love with an invisible heart

There's no way she could live up to the myth that I made
so I'll just remember her in my own way

I never thought that it would be easy
but I never thought it would be this hard
I was obsessed with a memory
I fell in love with an invisible heart

Northern Lights

2010-08-28T20:25:00.000-07:00

I forgot how to make you smile
I tried but I missed by a country mile
And I remember when I first tried
how we laughed until we cried

Your face lit up like the northern lights
keeping me warm on those winter nights
and the fire burning in your eyes
holding me close til the sunrise

but now you're tired of me
there ain't nothing I have that you haven't seen
and how we used to dream
of growing old and being free and always traveling

Now I can see in the night
under the glow of your warm soft light
And everything is still
and the way you touch me never fails to give me a chill
and I will hold you tight
under the northern lights

I know that time can be tough
make us take for granted the ones we love
but I'm just trying to find the spark
and find my way back to the start

but I need you to try
to think back to the time
when we were soft and high
and our words meant more than the reasons why

and I know that we can
count the times we really fought all on one hand
but we still gotta learn
how to be the one whose love you didn't have to earn

Tonight You Belong to Me

2010-08-09T20:05:00.000-07:00

This past weekend, Leah and I had a few glasses of wine and recorded a version of the old song "Tonight You Belong to Me," made famous by Steven Martin and Bernadette Peters in the movie 'The Jerk'. I don't know whether or not it was the wine or the fact that the tune was in the perfect key for both our voices, but I think it turned out pretty swell. Maybe we'll do a video version and post it on YouTube soon. Maybe Leah can learn how to play the Cornet by then and she can take a solo!

I know (I know)
You belong - to somebody new
But Tonight you belong to me...

Although (Although)
We're apart - your part of my heart..
And tonight you belong to me...

Way down by the stream..
How sweet it will seem..
Once more just to dream
In the moonlight...

My honey I know...
With the dawn..that you will be gone..
But tonight you belong to me...

Restless Again

2010-07-20T21:40:00.000-07:00

(photo by Nicole Franco)

You said that you wanted to see the world
and you just had to get out of this town
so we went as far as our money could
and tried to make another life for us

But after a while you were at it again
looking out the window longingly
you said it was time to move on
this life just wasn't enough for you

I don't know why you can't be happy
right where you are in the end
i just know that you'll never give up
and you'll always be restless again

Restless again
It's always the same old story
Over before it begins
You run away from all the people
Who try to get in
And give you something to believe in

I followed you to the ends of the earth
waiting for you to settle down
but you never stayed anywhere long enough
to feel like home and put your anchor down

I don't know why you can't be happy
right where you are in the end
i just know that you'll never give up
and you'll always be restless again

Moment

2010-07-05T12:54:00.000-07:00

(photo by Nicole Franco)

Everyone has a moment in their life
that they just can't seem to forget
that keeps them up late at night
in a cold cold sweat

Maybe it's the chance that you didn't take
maybe it's the chance you took
maybe it's the way you saw it from afar
maybe it's because you couldn't look

Maybe it's the one who went away
maybe it's the one who stayed
maybe it's the smile in a photograph
folded up and tucked away

Doesn't matter what you tell yourself
of how you're not afraid
always waiting to remind you of
the moment that got away
the time that you should've stayed
and the feeling you get
when you're lost in regret
for the the love that you could've made

You don't talk about it any more
it hurts too much to say
the wounds have healed but the scars remain
from that fateful day

But in the quiet moments and the soundless nights
the feelings come and go
i want to take you in to the light
and make sure we never let go

Times like these I'm reminded
of what you mean to me
and all the moments that add up
to the person I'm supposed to be
the way you remember me
and the lies that we tell
tell to ourselves
can't begin to set us free

Say Please

2010-07-05T12:34:00.000-07:00

(photo by Nicole Franco)

I found the T-shirt that you used to wear
in the back of my 63 chevy
and it smelled of leaves and lemonade
just how you left it for me

And as I go through the things
that we cared so much about
I can't believe that it ever seemed
like the future was ever in doubt

I never bothered to see
the darkness between the seems
and you did your best to shield
me from the pain of your dreams

And I never had to say please
never had to grovel or get down on my knees
You always took it in stride
Even though I could see it in your eyes

Now when I look back
and I see how much pain you were in
I can't forgive myself
for how I let it end

I Don't Believe

2010-05-04T19:55:00.000-07:00

I don't believe
In god or the prophets
They took all the profits
Bought there way to heaven

I don't believe
In separate but equal
They took all the people
And gave them different names

I don't believe
In the wars of my fathers
And all of the others
Who didn't make it back

I don't believe
That time is an arrow
Straight and narrow
Never looking back

I try to believe in you
Even if you don't want me to
Doesn't matter what you do
All the lies you tell are true.....to you

I don't believe
In the faces of evil
And all of the people
Who turn and look away

I don't believe
That the soul of a nation
Fighting for salvation
Can't seem to forgive

I don't believe
That the power of the stars
Makes us who we are
And who we're supposed to be

I don't believe
In artificial borders
Following orders
That keep us apart

I try to believe in you
Even if you don't want me to
Doesn't matter what you do
All the lies you tell are true.....to you

"Another Song"

2010-03-31T21:22:00.000-07:00

I've been accused of falling in love with your memory
Some people say I'm crazy, others say i'm just alone
If you could see the miserable state you left me
I think that you'd turn around and come home

And I've been saying that for years
Looking out the window through these tears
And I know that I must go on
and learn to sing another song

In my mind you could always do no wrong
I didn't listen when they said that you were going away
I always wondered how you could be so strong
shouldering the burden and weight of yesterday

Sometimes I think I should give up
Pour out what's left in my cup
Other times I want to keep on
Live to hear you sing another song

Even though you left when I was young
It seems like yesterday
and I will always be your son
until my dying day

The Life and Death of the Hummer

2010-02-28T09:49:00.000-08:00

After reading about the news that the Hummer brand was going to be put out to pasture by GM after a sale to a Chinese company fell through, I decided to do a write up on the history of the Hummer, along with a little analysis about its place in the American psyche. You can read it in full here: The Life and Death of the Hummer

Here is a short excerpt:

Ever since the Hummer burst onto the scene in the early 1990s after its coming out party during Operation Desert Storm and the Persian Gulf War (and with a little help from then-Terminator, now-Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger), the public has had a love-hate relationship with its super-sized combination of size, power, utility and consumption. More than any other car in the past two decades, the Hummer has come to represent the best and the worst aspects of American culture (depending on what political and cultural lens you happen to be looking through). To ecologically conscious progressives, the Hummer epitomized the bloated, overweight, aggressively militaristic characteristics of an empire whose citizens had become enamored with having the biggest toy on the block. To the right-leaning rugged individualist foreign policy hawks, it was a symbol of American ingenuity, military prowess and man's domination over nature and a harsh, unforgiving environment.

Mele Kalikimaka - IB Holiday Party

2010-02-27T03:16:00.001-08:00

The One I Used to Want

2010-01-10T22:37:00.001-08:00

You tried to hide behind the stars
On the black silver screen
And the way u stare at the dark
Makes me think you're not there

And when you try
To make up for the time you lost
And find a way
To be the one I used to want

I know you too well
That I cant make believe
And even if i could
I dont think it could make me leave

And when the end
Looks a lot like the beginning
The night gives way
To the brightness of the morning

I didn't listen to your warnings
You only told me the truth
That you were still in mourning
For the safety of your youth

And when you try
To make up for the time you lost
And find a way
To be the one I used to want

Life and Death

2009-12-08T22:50:00.000-08:00

I fell in love with her sister
and I think she loved me too
but her mother and her father
thought that I was no good

And I tried to show them
that I was worthy of her love
but no matter what I did
it was never enough

So I tried to test the faithful
by taking her from her home
but she wasn't even grateful
she said she felt so alone

And I tried to tell her
that it was all for the best
and that now we could be together
in life and in death

And you were always what I wanted
I knew I'd do anything to have you in my arms
and I know I made some bad decisions
but i never ever tried to do you harm

Thailand

2009-11-14T00:02:00.000-08:00

I don't often refer to things as the "Best Ever" this or that - but it's without any hesitation that I can say that I just got back from the best vacation that I've ever had. 10 days traveling around Thailand was a life changing experience and was filled with some of the most astounding, breathtaking and magical moments of my life.

There are a lot of things that made it so special, and not all of them had to do with the trip itself. For starters, this was the second big international trip that I planned, prepared and paid for by myself. Not only that, I was able to go with my girlfriend Leah (she deserved this vacation even more than I did). And while we'd taken trips together before (Costa Rica was the first one, but that was over a year ago), it really felt like this was bigger, longer, more exotic, and well deserved. After a year and a half without a proper vacation, the daily grind was starting to get to us. It couldn't have come at a better time.

We started our trip by flying from Los Angeles to Bangkok (with a stop over in Taipei, Taiwan). With only a day and a half in the capital, we had to make the most of it. The first afternoon, we took a walk through the busy streets to Lumphini park where we passed the statue of King Rama IV. The park was nice and we took a leisurely stroll around the lake before walking back to our hotel to get ready for dinner. Our hotel was only a short walk from the Mandarin Oriental, where we had cocktails and an excellent dinner while looking out at a colorful parade of boats light up the river at night. Both of us exhausted from almost a full day of traveling, we made it back to our room and crashed out.

The next day, we got up early and started by taking a ferry up the Chao Phraya River to the Grand Palace - an epic collection of gilded halls, golden spires and mythical statues. It was a short walk down to Wat Pho, home of the reclining Buddha - an immense golden statue that seemed to go on for miles. We ate a delicious lunch on the waterfront, with some much needed air conditioning and a large Singha beer! We headed back to the dock and commissioned a private long tail boat to take us through the canals.

How It's Supposed to Be

2009-10-24T23:23:00.000-07:00

This is the first song that I wrote solely on the Mandolin. While in the past I've mainly used it to add color and depth, this one came about from a simple strumming pattern that I came up with while starring out the window on a rainy night a couple of weeks ago. It starts out simple and spare, with just the muted mandolin and a plucked banjo...the vocals come in after a measure and the melody floats along with the chord changes for the opening verses. The bass and guitar come in as the chorus starts, lifting the song up to the hook at the end of the chorus. If you listen closely, you may even hear a hint of auto-tune goodness in one of the vocal tracks.

Rain on my window
sunshine on my hair
she told me that it's over
but i can't seem to care

My friends ask me if Im ok
i don't know what to say
it may seem like i lost something
but it was just in my way

I don't regret a minute
or how it meant to me
i only wish that she could see
how it's supposed to be

Sand in my shoes
salt water in my eyes
I swam out to the edge of the world
and said my goodbyes

And as i drifted down
to the ocean floor
i thought i saw your face
looking on from the shore

And even if it wasn't meant to be
you still helped me to see
everything that surrounds me
and how it's supposed to be

Beneath the Willow Tree

2009-09-24T21:47:00.000-07:00

I won't lie - my latest song definitely has a Country vibe to it. Starting with the plucked guitar riff and simple melody and ending with mandolin and banjo parts for flavor, this one has the laid back, open air feel to it that I've been trying to capture these past few months. The harmony is strong and basic and the chorus lifts the melody to a nice refrain. Nothing earth-shattering, just a nice, simple structure.

When writing the lyrics, I started to think back to some of the places that I've lived in the past 10 years and all of the different people that I knew. Each place seemed like "Home" while I was living there - the friends, colleagues, familiar places, sights, sounds, smells. Yet each time, the things that really made it seem like a home started to fade away (friends leaving, jobs ending, relationships coming apart) and eventually I took my cue to move on as well. Although I still idealize those places (and that time in my life), I still get the feeling that I may still be a long way from finding that final place I want to call home.

Download here or listen:

There was a place I had a home
among the leaves, among the snow
and I still go there in my dreams
even though its not as perfect as it seems

and all my friends they moved on
and I couldn't figure out where I belonged
but luck and fate they always knew
that I'd always just come right back to you

Because where you are is never where you thought you'd be
and I can't seem to make myself believe
that in the end I'll find the place I was meant to be
fast asleep beneath the willow tree

The way we were it breaks my heart
because I couldn't imagine being apart
but then we were, and life went on
and I think of us each time I hear that song

And when the rain began to fall
and the sun began to call
I packed my things and drove away
and I haven't been back to this day

Because where you are is never where you thought you'd be
and I can't seem to make myself believe
that in the end I'll find the place I was meant to be
fast asleep beneath the willow tree

Cook to Bang

2009-09-15T22:06:00.000-07:00

Alright, this is so great I just have to post it. Last Friday night, my girlfriend and I spent an hour or so writing a birthday song for our good friend Spencer, whose blog Cook to Bang details his culinary and sexual exploits - with tons of great recipes. Using my newly purchased Autotune iphone app (thanks T-Pain!), we sang and rapped over a smooth beat and came up with this little gem. If I'd known R&B was this easy to make, I'd have been doing it long ago.

Download here or listen:

Lyrics:

This is for all you hungry lovers out there
looking to have a gourmet affair
spencer will show you what you need
to have her down on her knees

It's a little thing he likes to call Cook to Bang
giving you sexy new ways to entertain
his recipes drive the ladies insane
and you may have to clean up a stain

If you wanna get her in the sack
and make her lips smack
all you have to do is pull out your spice rack
and whip her up a tasty snack

You too can be the boom king
you'll make her taste buds sing
They'll say foo de fa fa
as they show you their fritatas

You can Cook to Bang
Aww Yeah
Everybody Cook to Bang
Even You

It's the latest sensation
Cook to Bang is sweeping the nation
take a sip of his libation lubrication
Get ready for a culinary home invasion

He's a lecherous leprechaun
Trying to help you get your groove on
so don't be afraid of your stove and oven
they'll help you get some good good lovin

So slip on your apron and put on your mits
and go grab your pots and pans
and give her something to put in her mouth
it'll make you feel like a man

Mushroom Cloud

2009-09-01T23:14:00.000-07:00

Here is my contribution to the numerous amazing pictures that have been taken of the great Los Angeles fires of 2009:

Levity

2009-08-25T23:05:00.001-07:00

This is a song that I recorded in the first few months after moving to LA - inspired by a poem written by my friend Colin McCrudden that I found while browsing his blog:

Download here or listen:

Lyrics (by Colin McCrudden):
I've carried these stones
across rivers
through forests of your broken heart

She told me her story
with blistered lips
under the silk night sky the worst untold

And if this empty room fills with sound
if the windows crack, stories unfold
lightness in my feet will fade
levity will light my way.......back home

I've carried these stones
across rivers
through forests of your broken heart

I'm tied to this chair
want to run away
dissolve in the atmosphere like the secret i am

And if this empty room fills with sound
if the windows crack, stories unfold
lightness in my feet will fade
levity will light my way.......back home

Summer in the city

2009-08-24T23:15:00.001-07:00

Summer in the city...

A False History

2009-08-23T02:08:00.000-07:00

I know it's a little out of order, but this is actually my first experiment with the harmonica. This one is pretty laid back as well, although the added banjo on the chorus section gives it a little bouncier feel than the other two. The lyrics to this one come directly from a poem I wrote a long time ago (no idea when - but I could probably date it from the notebook I found it in). It's a pretty solemn poem, and I'm not sure how well it translated into song form, but I think it serves its purpose well.

Download here or listen:

Lyrics:
The World that we know
Is a tale often told
Around the dinner table
Or in the church of old

A history of valiant men
and tyrants who deceive
of empires that triumph
and women kneeling greive

Its written in the blood of many
for the few who learn to read
and the business of editing
is left to those that breathe

But what lays buried in the deep
beneath the sands and deserts creep
stories that were never told
bodies that were bought and sold

Heroes who were later framed
witnesses who'd gone insane
sightings people didn't see
and books which tell a false history.

The Scientists they tell us
that only the strong survive
and by that very reason
that some should turn and die

But in their death they speak to us
of a future never known
events that didn't happen
outside an epic poem

And with the written word
a reformation bloomed
armies of the lower class
were brutally consumed

Books were burned, and stories lost
Empires fallen, Left to dust
And out of that, we learned to trust
the stories that we're told

But what could have happened, always did
and what once was small, now is big
and It doesn't matter how far you dig
you'll only find the trail cold

Sunset from our balcony

2009-08-17T19:07:00.001-07:00

Another amazing sunset from our balcony!

-- Post From My iPhone

Since the Fall

2009-08-14T22:28:00.000-07:00

"Since the Fall" is the third song that I've recorded in the past few weeks that features the Harmonica I bought myself for my birthday. As the 3rd song in what I like to call the 'Harmonica Trilogy', I think that this is the best one yet. This one really came together quickly - the lyrics, music, recording, mixing. As an added bonus, I even got to use a Mandolin for the first time in any of my recordings (thanks to Alan Olifson for lending it to me). I think it really adds a nice touch!

While the subject matter of this one is kind of sad and a little depressing, it touches on subjects that I've been dealing with a lot this past month or so.

Download here or listen:

Lyrics:
The room was dark and the air was stale
and he sat in the corner underneath the clock
and i walked up behind him and pulled up a chair
and wondered how long he'd been sitting there

He turned his head and said to me
dont ever get old like me
and i turned away so i wouldnt see
how much he looked like me

And maybe time is crueler to some
and maybe it lies to us all
but without the years it all seems the same
and the time we've lived since the fall

And I told him that I'd found a girl
with rosy lips and long brown hair
and I was going to settle down
and try to find something peaceful there

He pulled me close and smiled at me
treat her well and she'll be true
and don't let your own destiny
stand in the way of the beautiful view

And maybe time is crueler to some
and maybe it lies to us all
but without the years it all seems the same
and the time we've lived since the fall

Herbie & Lang Lang

2009-08-08T22:52:00.001-07:00

Herbie Hancock & Lang Lang @ the Hollywood Bowl

Absolutely amazing show!!

eMuse Zine Article

2009-08-08T22:05:00.000-07:00

Here is a link to an article in the eMuse zine about my thumbtack art:
eMuse Artist March 2009

eMuse is a really cool online literary magazine that features great stories, poems and other fiction from up and coming writers. They also have a small section where they feature a different artist each month.

Year of the Gun

2009-08-08T21:24:00.000-07:00

Here's a new song that I've been working on. It's pretty slow, mellow and definitely acoustic. My second song to use my new harmonicas...I tried to use it a little more sparingly on this one.

Download here or listen:

Lyrics:
Left my home in idaho
traveled half way round the sun
and I floated in the dark
til the night became my love

Dont know what i was running from
or what i may have done
and ill dream myself to sleep
underneath the fog

Live the life that i told myself
didn't want to be someone else

It was 1985
when you stopped being alive
and you left me all of this
no matter how you tried

In the year of the gun
I became undone
Having faced my favorite fears
and watched them overcome

Live the life that i told myself
didn't want to be someone else
maybe time will show me how
to realize its only now

A positive LSD story...

2009-05-16T02:21:00.000-07:00

Ennio Morricone + Bill Hicks = Awesome

Download here or listen:

Zetabid Commercial

2009-05-04T21:02:00.000-07:00

Check out the commercial that my girlfriend Leah and I were in recently. I really think that my acting in this spot is Oscar-worthy. We are the gorgeous couple in front of the computer - if you blink, you'll probably miss us.

Piano Theme

2009-05-03T02:35:00.002-07:00

Here is a track that I recorded on our new electric piano. I recorded it on my iPhone with an app called FourTrack. Pretty amazing sound quality for a phone!

Download here or listen:

I'm Back...

2009-05-02T19:09:00.000-07:00

So, after months of only using my blog to promote job related stuff (my old one), I've finally gone back and deleted all of those useless posts so that I can refocus this blog on things that actually matter to me. And while I may throw in a post or two highlighting what I'm working on in my new gig, I am going to try to keep this primarily about my life, my thoughts, and the various projects that I'm working on. Speaking of new projects, here is what's been going on in the past few months...

The biggest recent development is (of course) my new job! After two years at Mahalo, I really felt like it was time to move on. While the start-up life was exhilarating and fast paced, and I learned an incredible amount, the constant stress and the ridiculous work load just became too much for me to handle. Work/Life balance is important to me and I was tired of being on call 24/7. Maybe that makes me un-epic...if so, then so be it.

My new job, in contrast, is less stressful, gives me more responsibility, and pays more to boot! I'm now working for a company called Internet Brands, Inc. and my official title is Content Manager. Basically, I'm in charge of organizing the creation of content for IB's portfolio of Automotive websites, including CarsDirect and Autos.com. It's a lot like what I was doing for Mahalo, just on a much bigger scale. And while I'm certainly no car expert, I'm going to be recruiting a bunch of freelance writers that are.

Another perk of my new job is that I actually have my own personal workspace. Not a cubicle, per se, but an actual area to call my own. No more squeezing in a giant table with a bunch of other people and getting moved around every couple of weeks. Besides that, I work on the 11th floor of a building with amazing views of LA all around. Eating my lunch from the break room, I can watch airplanes take off from LAX with the Santa Monica mountains in the background. Pics below:

Small Town

2008-10-16T08:38:00.000-07:00

This past weekend, we took a trip to the central valley to help my grandfather celebrate his 90th birthday. And while Fresno California may not technically be a small town, it sure has the look and feel of the hundreds of small farming communities that line the U.S. 99 highway. As I sat as a passenger in the car as we dropped down out of the Tehachapi mountains, past the grapevine and down into the dusty fields of the valley, I couldn't help but think back to those family road trips that we use to take to visit the grandparents. I remember staring longingly out the window at the rows of fruit orchards, run down drive-ins, family-run hardware stores and outdated hamburgers stands; nostalgic for a way of life and time of place that I had never actually experienced. I'm still not sure what it was I saw in all of those dusty moving pictures, but I vividly remember the feelings that they brought me.

Jet Lag

2008-10-07T08:14:00.001-07:00

At this point, I don't think my body knows when it's supposed to be awake and when it's supposed to be asleep. After a week of working the graveyard shift, and a 13 hour flight back across the Pacific ocean (back in time actually - but I'm not going to get into that), my mind seems to have short-circuited a bit. I spent most of yesterday staggering around in a semi-conscious haze, awake and alert enough to run a few meaningless errands and take care of a few pieces of business, but not lucid enough for any real work. And while it felt great to be home with the familiar comforts of my apartment (strumming my guitar, reading the paper, watching TV), I still couldn't help but get the feeling that I wasn't actually back yet. Although my body seemed ready to get back to its old routine, my mind hadn't caught up to it. A brief nap in the afternoon helped me get my bearings a little better and helped my mind start to clear up a bit. In retrospect, though, it might have done more harm than good, as I couldn't get to sleep all last night. Even though I felt like I should be tired, my mind just wasn't buying it. I finally gave up after a night off tossing and turning and got out of bed at 6am, took a shower, and walked down the street to get breakfast. And you know what, I didn't feel so bad. Maybe I didn't need the sleep. Who knows. I guess it will all just have to sort itself out, whether it makes sense to me or not. So here I am, one cup of coffee and a blog post into my new day, wondering if my Circadian rhythm will snap back like a rubber band - hoping it will.

The Night Shift

2008-10-02T09:36:00.000-07:00

Working the night shift does strange things to your brain. It's not that the world is a different place when it's dark out (I can't even see outside right now), it's more about the vague feeling you get that you are the only one awake in the world, the only person who isn't fast asleep in their comfortable beds. It's as if you are the only one minding the store while the rest of the world gets some shut eye. Keeping watch over the world until the dark has passed. And while thoughts like that may invoke feelings of loneliness and separation, they can also be strangely liberating and exciting. Like our fantasies of being left alone in a department store after closing, or being the last human alive after a worldwide catastrophe, the idea that we are alone - that we can do or say anything without being seen or heard - are as basic and profound as the first time our parents left us home alone for the night. And as the hours and minutes take us closer and closer to the light, we cling to those moments of freedom and solitude - reminders of a world in which we were in control.

I'd Tell You, But I'd Have to Kill You...

2008-10-01T09:35:00.000-07:00

The last three weeks have been an incredible experience. And while I can't tell you where I've been or what I what I was doing there, I can tell you that I will remember it for the rest of my life. The people that I've met and the things that I've seen will stay with me for a very long time, long after I return home and get back to my normal life. To be honest, I never thought that I would be at a place in my life (or my career) where I could be called on to do something like this - and the fact that I am (and was) just serves to remind me that you can't predict where these things will take you and that small decisions in your life can lead you to some pretty exotic places. Things like this happen to other people, in other professions, with other lives. They don't happen to me. Except that they did.

The Ghosts of Saturday Night

2008-10-01T09:15:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I'm actually doing this, but here it goes anyway. After years of refusing to start my own blog (amid repeated attempts by my boss, friends, and the little people who live under my bed to do so), I finally got bored enough that I broke down and set up this blog right here. And as I sit here working the graveyard shift in a strange and distant land, wondering what I could possibly write that would be of any interest to anyone but myself, I'm starting to realize that it doesn't really matter. This blog isn't for anyone. It's not even for me. It's for the Ghosts of Saturday Night.